Friday, September 13, 2019

My Baby is Going to School

Monday I sent my four year old off to his first day of Pre-K. My original plan was to keep him and his brother home as long as I could, because who wants to send their kids off into this crazy world.  After the loss of Brecken we decided it was best for Easton (and me) to attend school with friends and a teacher besides his mom. Because to be honest, he started to not like me teaching him, and that wouldn't work if I kept him home. 

The first day I sprung the news to him that he would be going to school he politely informed me that he was in fact NOT going to school because he knew everything already. Well then. So I followed up with a question. If you know everything than what is 2+2?  He then very confidently responded with a ... mom that is easy, its 4.  Um. OK. But your still going to school.

I spent the last few weeks getting him all ready. Cute over sized backpack... check. Snacks... check. New school clothes and shoes that actually fit... check. School supplies... check. Convincing him that he actually had to go to school.... hard but check. The only item unchecked was finding the mom strength to let him go. 

It was so much harder than I thought. After I watched him balance on that magical yellow line and go with his teacher and all his new friends to their classroom, I lost it. My baby boy that day wasn't so little. He was confident and happy and ready. Now don't get me wrong, I was excited for him. I am so happy this little chapter of his life is starting. But it was really really hard. 

It was hard because I got to send my four year old off to school but I will never get to send Brecken off to school It was hard because I got to make the cute class of 2033 shirt for Easton but I will never get to make a shirt for Brecken. It was hard because I got to watch Easton walk off with that over sized backpack and see the excitement on his face, but I wont ever feel that with Brecken. I got to check off all the boxes with Easton, but I will never get to check those boxes off with Brecken. So it was an exciting day but it was a hard day.  And that is OK.

One week down and school is going great. Easton loves it. It has been bittersweet but I stay strong for Easton. And I know his little brother is up in heaven cheering him on too.

Happy School year to all those kiddos and parents! Be strong. 

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