#mommingstrong

Tuesday, February 25, 2020

One Running Beside Me, One Flying Above Me, and One Growing Inside



I am sure you have noticed I have been a little bit quiet on here for the last few months. And that's because pregnancy after loss is scary and incredibly isolating.  It is full of an extreme amount of emotions, stress, yet with of course all the happiness and joy.

Ever since I was little I dreamed of having a large family. I "said" I wanted 6 kids!! But the moment they handed me my sweet boy after a month of being intubated and told us that he had Alpers was the moment our lives changed. Our world not only crashed, but my life as a mommy changed too.

It took us quite awhile to think about and talk about growing our family after the loss of Brecken. It was scary and daunting and I just wasn't sure just what our future would hold. After weighing out our options, it was decided that we were most comfortable doing IVF (in vitro fertalization) with PGD (preimplantation genetic diagnosis).

Although our most expensive option, we knew with this decision it would give us the peace of mind that our future children would be tested and free from the Alpers that took Brecken away.

Science is incredible. I mean really. Amazing. Baby K3 (what we have named him/her for now) might have started out in a science lab but is now growing incredibly inside of me. And that in itself has no explanation.

I couldn't be more excited to feel baby's kicks and moves soon. I love hearing baby's heartbeat. This baby is so extremely loved already and means so much to our family. I hope in the days and months ahead I can give you a little part of my story. My story of truly MommingStrong.